The Wedding Was A Smash! (In More Ways Than One).

Sorry for the late post. There was a lot of running around to do before I had a chance to sit and relax for a moment and type some things out on the computer.

Well, I'm happy to announce that the wedding ceremony was a huge success! I saw the bride become a nervous wreck before the wedding when things that she didn't even need to know about were brought to her attention. Things such as bridesmaids running around yelling at each other and blaming each other about vases that were left at home that were supposed to be on the head table, a missing corsage, and some unlit candles. "It wasn't MY job! Was it?"


With each thing said, the bride became more and more visibly shaken. It was time for someone, anyone, to assume some sort of order and delegate authority. With a slightly stern voice, that I would use to stop and argument between two preteen daughters, "Ladies!", I began, "Let's take care of the things that can be taken care of right now and let's completely forget about the things that we can no longer do nothing about!" I said. "You!", pointing at one of the bridesmaids, who's name I had no idea, "Take this lighter and light all the candles! You have 4 minutes. GO!", I continued, "This wedding is going to take place with or without vases for the head table and since the guests have never seen them in the first place, they won't know anything is missing." (I was on a roll!) "You!", pointing at another nameless bridesmaid within earshot, "Do you know what car the flowers came in?", I asked. She nodded yes. "Quickly go to that car and check for the missing flower. If it's there, great! If not, too bad.". I looked at the others, "Everyone else stay calm and don't say anything else that will make the bride upset or nervous".



I walked to over to the bride and said, "Everything is fine. The only thing I want you to do is relax, walk down the isle and get married. Okay?" She said, "Okay.", and then smiled.



With that, I walked to where the Groom and the groomsman were. Thankfully, everything was going just fine in there. The only thing I had to do in there was to grab the few groomsman that were outside having a smoke. We all walked into the hall and the wedding began.



As I looked around, the candles were all lit, (check), the brides mother had her corsage on, (check), and not one guest was pointing and talking about missing vases that they had never seen before, (check!).



The ceremony went off without a hitch! Everyone stood where they were supposed to be standing, everyone stood up and sat back down when they were supposed to, the bride and groom repeated after me when they were supposed to repeat after me, and not one word was mispronounced.



After I spoke the words, "Ladies and Gentlemen, I consider it an honor to be the very first person to introduce to you, Mr. and Mrs. Cortez!", the congregation erupted in applause and I thought to myself, "Half of the people, including my wife, are crying and smiling at the same time... I must have done a pretty good job!"



My only regret was that Becky said that she got so wrapped up in the ceremony, that she forgot to take any pictures of me actually performing it! So the only shot I have from the wedding is one of the bride, groom and I posing for the photographer. But that's okay.




After that, it was "Party Time!". Or so I thought. Being invited to stay for the reception, I had almost forgot that I would have one more small job. I would have to give the prayer to bless the meal. How could I forget something like that? I had nothing prepared! I would have to say it, 'off the cuff'. After I was done, I returned to our table. Becky had a look on her face. One of, "I've heard that blessing before!" I could see she was going through her mental Rolodex. Going through every movie or TV show she has ever seen. "Where have I heard that blessing before?", she asked. With a smile I simply replied, "It was the one that was said at our wedding." How's THAT for a photographic memory? LOL!


I will have to say that the hors d'oeuvres and appetizers were divine, the soup was out of this world and the main course, consisting of a roasted half chicken, a huge twice baked potato and green beans was fantastic! The open bar seemed to have a constant flow of people coming to and from it.


As the night and the merriment progressed I have to say that Becky and I did pretty good. We were a little tipsy, but we never got "sloshed". I had a few concerns when at one point late in the evening I saw Becky, with a freshly broken wine glass in hand, laying on the dance floor in a puddle of wine. "Uh oh.", I thought.


But it turned out that while she was dancing with a friend of ours, while she was in a mid twirl, someone else knocked into her, throwing her off balance and sending her crashing to the floor. She has a nice bump and bruise of her knee this morning as a sore reminder.


But all in all, the night was complete success. We had a really fun time and a great night out. Bruises and all. LOL!


So if you were all wondering... The preacher's wife was wonderful.


Until next time... PEACE!!!